i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
