I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
