are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
