we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
