I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
