Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
