the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
