i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Randomize
