Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
