ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
