no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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