Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize
