I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
