I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
