we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
