Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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