My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Randomize
