how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
