i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize