the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
