Her vagina should come with caution tape.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
