Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize