You're completely useless in the revolution.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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