is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
