Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
