please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
