just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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