If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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