And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
