not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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