if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
