Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
