Quick, to the slutcave!
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I enjoy the company of your penis
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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