As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
