I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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