Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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