I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
MIDGETS
????
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
