Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
