Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
i think my cat just said my name.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
