Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Two words: nipple clamps
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