I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
This is my life. Enjoy the view
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
