this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
