That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
