If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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