About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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