I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
