I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
