I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
