playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
