People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
