i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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